Rags and Riches

Today I walked through aisles of wealth, down streets laden with luxurious jewelry stores and into buildings filled to the brim with expensive clothing, perfumes, and housewares. There was a Starbucks here, a fancy steakhouse there, and Tiffany’s down the most manicured, brick-lined road you’ve ever seen. As I made my way through the land of plenty, I couldn’t help but look across the street at all of the people buzzing in and out of stores and long to tread down a dirt path to greet my friends in places afar. I realize such desires may sound like madness to you. After all, who would want to trade such lavishness for a dirt road and a village hut anyway?

It’s not that I don’t want nice things, but when I look at them, all I can think about is how in the end having things doesn’t glorify God. Having things doesn’t bring me joy. Sure, I may be able to use some physical/material things in ministry, but at the end of the day God doesn’t need anything from me. He has more than enough on His own, and more than enough power to do what He pleases no matter what I have or don’t have. And I think the craziest part of that is He chooses to use His people to do His work. I’m not worthy of that, but still He chooses to use me.

Shopping, searching for more, always has a way of making me yearn for less. Less junk to fill up my already cluttered apartment, less things to make my place look “pretty,” and less stuff that I truly just do not need. Today I searched through what seemed like never ending racks of clothing only to find something that absolutely made me want to vomit. This shirt.

I ran my fingers over the shirt and stuck my pinky through the torn fabric as if to check and see if the rips were actually present. This ratty, old, torn-up t-shirt looked like something I saw a four year old wearing as he ran down a rocky path in Haiti with no underwear and no shoes. He wore nothing but that t-shirt… and was grateful for it. It was the only thing his mother could give him. The shirt that I saw in the store was on “sale” for $39.99 (it usually goes for $68). For the sale price you could sponsor that child for a month, for the regular price you could sponsor him for almost two. That child could have an education and hope for a better tomorrow, and maybe even a new shirt, but we are too busy dressing ourselves in rags to notice the hurt and poverty that he lives in, and the spiritual poverty that we so often refuse to let God drag us out of.

Some may call me a hypocrite for writing this. I drive a nice car, I have an iPhone, I am able to make this post on this blog while sitting at home drinking a cup of coffee 1700 miles away from the child I sponsor… but rest assured that there is a constant battle inside of me over things I think I should have, things I need, and things I could really stand to let go of. I am not immune to the human condition of desiring more, but I only hope that God would fill that desire and that I wouldn't even attempt to fill the void with material things. I hope that one day I can look back at my life and know that though I messed up some things, God was able to use them, and use me to bring glory to Him.

I hope that as a nurse I am able to share the love of God with the patient suffering a miscarriage, with the grandfather who was just diagnosed with cancer, with the dying woman surrounded at the bedside by her loving children… Those situations and more are not uncommon occurrences at my job. I’ve seen things that absolutely make me sick in the world and at work, but I know that there is a reason I am in the specific situation I am in at that given time, and I am trusting God to guide me in that each day - even if in that day my heart must ache for others who are hurting or for this depraved world, I pray that I will listen to God's voice and trust in His guidance… And I pray that you will too. Let's not dress ourselves in rags when the creator of the universe wants to cover us with righteousness.